[ a familiar ache settles in her chest, and for the first time, she has to close her eye to keep it from watering.
because isn't it the same, for her?
it's been three years since she's seen rua, her twin brother, older by only an hour—but only (only) two and a half since rua, her older brother by nearly a decade. sure, he grew up with his sister, but he didn't grow up with her. she is, with every hour, growing up without him.
even if she returns to the city from here, to the same moment and day, there's no guarantee that she will ever see him again. she's known that for a long time, now. and if he arrives here... there's no telling who he would be. someone who had never come to the city in the first place. someone who'd grown up, had a family, had a future of his own. someone she would have to call a younger brother.
the chasm is wide, and can only be made wider.
without looking at him, ruka swallows, as though that could kill a grief like this. ]
no subject
because isn't it the same, for her?
it's been three years since she's seen rua, her twin brother, older by only an hour—but only (only) two and a half since rua, her older brother by nearly a decade. sure, he grew up with his sister, but he didn't grow up with her. she is, with every hour, growing up without him.
even if she returns to the city from here, to the same moment and day, there's no guarantee that she will ever see him again. she's known that for a long time, now. and if he arrives here... there's no telling who he would be. someone who had never come to the city in the first place. someone who'd grown up, had a family, had a future of his own. someone she would have to call a younger brother.
the chasm is wide, and can only be made wider.
without looking at him, ruka swallows, as though that could kill a grief like this. ]
How does that make you selfish?